A Theological Blog

My college friend Henry Kwant sent me this, and it was just too good not to share . . .
How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Charismatic : Only 1 – Hands are already in the air.

Pentecostal : 10 – One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians : None – Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholic: None – Candles only.

Baptists : At least 15 – One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.

Episcopalians: 3 – One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.

Mormons : 5 – One man to change the bulb, and four women to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians : We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb.. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodists : Undetermined – Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.

Nazarene : 6 – One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

Lutherans : None – Lutherans don’t believe in change.

Amish : What’s a light bulb?

Well . . . God love them all! And he does! And he probably thinks that’s quite funny! There is a verse in Scripture that says, “The God who sits in the heavens will laugh . . .”, and that, more than anything else, has helped me understand, and often appreciate, the church and all of its foolishness in spite of itself.